Having an Abortion Made Me Pro-Life; My Baby and I Were Failed

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Written by Alyce Auman

I am Pro-Life. However, I do not force my views onto others. This is a difficult issue for me as I can recognize the thought processes on both sides of this topic. I strongly urge for us as a society to do our women and society justice and promote sexual education, birth control, and push for awareness of private sector sources that can provide women with resources for these and other support.  If we start at a young age, and working together as parents and community, we can provide real information to our children and help them become more aware of themselves and the good and bad consequences of their actions.

Wouldn’t it be better to respect women and teach them about their individual uniqueness?  Why do we praise successful women who go to college and make a bunch of money, but we don’t praise a woman who births children and raises them? How is that equal? Parts of our society looks at breastfeeding and birthing children like it’s such a problem? Did people forget how THEY got here? We should be ashamed at ourselves that instead of building women up, respecting their abilities that men cannot do, we push an agenda of how to “succeed” only the ways that men succeed. I have been down both paths.

Yes, at 19, I walked into a Planned Parenthood. I was scared to death because I was in an awful relationship and I knew I was pregnant.  I knew that if I kept the baby, I would have a connection with my soon to be ex forever.  For many reasons, this was not a good idea.  I had no idea what I was going to do.  The doctor at Planned Parenthood talked to me about my options.  She said abortion, adoption, or keeping the child. (in that order)  She asked me my situation.  She said that in order to save myself from that bad situation, I should have an abortion so I could be free of this burden. Riding on my anxiety and fear at that moment, and having no parents myself to turn to, I agreed.  Lack of counseling, lack of a support system, combined with my fear of staying in a bad relationship lead me to believe that it was my only way out.  I have never stopped regretting that decision.

I have had two children since then and they have become everything to me.  You can chose to end a life, but you will never forget making that choice.  There were no referrals to outside sources that would be able to help me or counsel me if I chose to keep the baby. There were no referrals to counselors to help me deal with my decision. We are failing our women by telling them that their only way out is to end a life.  We are failing women by not teaching them to embrace their gift of giving life.  We are failing women by telling them that they aren’t successful if they are “just a mom.”  We are failing women to allow them to endure that pain that they alone made that decision.

One day I sat and realized that I have two boys and that aborted child could’ve been a girl.   Then I realized how hypocritical it was of me to try to save myself while ruining another person, possibly another woman.  She could’ve done a lot with her life that I took from her.  Isn’t the point of being pro woman to be pro all women? Even those we are carrying inside of us?

Men can easily push for a woman to have an abortion so that they are let off the hook.  A woman cannot erase going through one.  Abortion is not a solution; it’s just a different kind of hell.  Abortion should definitely not be used as a routine form of birth control when there are much better options.


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  • TheTomato

    Wahhhh. Crybaby. It’s no ones “fault” but yours. You got pregnant with no way to support a kid. You decided it wasn’t the right time. You paid to have it ended. Quit whining. Your life would not have been a wonderful bed of roses if you had that kid and you know it. Regret is for losers. Drive on.

    • Tim Turner

      I see we have a rotten tomato. Thanks for the perspective, Alyce.