4 Reasons Austin Petersen Won’t Be President in 2020

By: Jason Hinrichs

Co-founder of The Reformed Collective, Seminary Student, and Austin Petersen Fanboy

There’s nothing to look forward to in the 2016 election season. Instead, let us look forward and ask the right questions? Why will Austin Petersen not be in the oval office come 2020? Here are a few:

1. He Hates Safety


Can you believe it? In an interview with Jason Stapleton, Austin Petersen had the gall to say that it is not the government’s job to protect its citizens, but rather to protect its citizens’ liberties. Austin loves the terrorists.

2. He Despises Loyalty


You stand for liberal principles, but the Democratic Party elected Clinton, who gets in bed with numerous big businesses. You stand for conservative principles, but the Republican Party elected Trump, who gets in numerous beds.

Petersen wants you to abandon your party and vote Libertarian, as a principled vote or as a protest vote. He wants you to sell out your loyal party to vote with your conscience. Austin loves the Brutuses of the world.

3. He Refuses To Be Kind



Austin is a jerk. One time in a live stream he said Gary Johnson was very antithetical to libertarianism in his stance on #bakethecakegate. First he tells you to abandon your party, then he tells you to call someone out on inconsistency? The only thing Mr. Petersen embraces more than treason is incivility.

4. He Loathes The Government Helping People

You have five mouths to feed; three children, your spouse, and yourself. You try to find a job, but man is this economy terrible. Does Austin care? No. Instead of you being dependent on the welfare system, he wants you to get up, reach out and ask for someone to help you in your time of need.

The government doesn’t ask you to swallow your pride. Austin loves to kill your self-esteem.

Could you vote for someone who hates safety, loyalty, kindness, and help? I sure hope not. Come 2020, I sure hope you make the right decision and choose the Clinton/Trump ticket.


  • scopeless22 .

    Satire at it’s finest.

  • Rio Grande

    Seriously though, I sincerely hope the Republicans leaving the GOP will take over the LP and give the LP some seats in state legislatures in 2018; then give Peterson the nomination in 2020.

  • Was this article like Jonathan Swift’s Modest Proposal? If not, its points don’t carry much weight. Like any smart kid, Austin can be snarky absent merit or substance. But we all need maturing, sometimes. Else, he’s a brilliant guy who would make a very good President someday.

    I’d like to see him team up with Ted Cruz, as the latter’s VP. Thus Austin has 16 years not merely 8. But whether that should be 2020, I’m thinking not yet. Libertarian needs to have more folks in Congress. So maybe 2024.

    And before you rail on Ted as being religious, listen to his Wednesday speech at the #RNCinCLE . For there, he went full Libertarian, whether he intended to or not. He’s my senator, so we’ll know for sure in 2018 and later. Would be a good fit for him to leave GOP and go to the calmer, gentler side of the Libertarian party.