LISTEN TO TLR’S LATEST PODCAST:
Written by Crystal Byrd
I can’t pretend to speak for every woman who identifies as a Libertarian or an Ancap, but I would like to address an issue of importance to all of us in the afore-mentioned groups. I can’t tell you how many times I’ve seen this…
“Why aren’t there more Libertarian/Ancap women”?
“Liberty Ladies are unicorns”
“I wish I could find a Libertarian/Ancap girl”
These are always followed by the same discussion and the same players rear their ugly heads every time. Unfortunately, the not shitty dudes often seem genuinely lost as to the answer, so I’m gonna spell it out for you.
1) Shitty dudes are all about the individual except when it comes to women.
There’s always that one guy who just has to pipe up about how all women want is your pocketbook, women are pre-programmed to be dependent on the state, women enjoy being victims, women are more likely to need government assistance so they’re naturally statist etc. ad nauseam. Bruh, I’m sorry your wife fucked your best friend, divorced you, took all your shit, and won’t let you see your kids. I am. Deeply. That’s absolutely FUBAR, but please for the love of Mary, stop cock-blocking the younger guys who aren’t washed up and bitter. They’ve still got a chance at landing a good girl and having a healthy and productive relationship. Your diarrhea of the keyboard is making the ladies who aren’t crazy bitches stop conversing and you’re not fooling anyone pretending you’re not talking about yourself. We are not a hive mind collective. We’re women and – newsflash- we’re all individuals too. We’re ALL different.
2) Outright Insults
OMFG- this point right here. Y’all, when a dude responds to a woman in a comment thread by insulting her appearance, intelligence, or driving………(deep breath) Women will simply generally choose to go elsewhere. Some will respond and attempt to combat this baseless and obvious reverse SJW behavior, but many will not. Let me explain, women have a billion outlets for socialization. We generally have many choices of where we go to engage in conversation and the exchange of ideas. Social media is not our only source for filling our “interaction” tank. When you resort to these tactics we simply leave and often don’t come back, because- why would we? We can just start another group and populate it with people who can handle exchanging ideas with women and sometimes having those women make better arguments or points than themselves. Also, on a quick note- responding with “I’ve never seen women be insulted in that way here” or “triggered much?” is part of the problem.
3) Thirsty Dudes
Fellas, I know as Libertarians or Ancaps we tend to draw folks who may not be the epitome of social couth. Women are very forgiving and understanding of guys when we can tell they’re really trying to say the right thing, but struggling. What I’m about to say is still applicable. Here are some examples of things that make girls block you or simply leave the discussion in disgust. I shouldn’t even have to say this, but, dick pics. No. Stahp. If a girl you don’t know in real life or are not in a relationship with asks you for a dick pic, it’s because she wants to laugh at you with her friends. Don’t do this. If you find a girl online that you actually would like to hit on, leave the shitposting and sarcasm out. Girls are not sitting back going “oh that was a sick burn he posted about me…I wonder if he’s single?” Negative, Ghostrider. Go with tradition. Compliments and Questions. Ignore this advice at your own peril; you’re a big boy, but don’t sit back and bitch about her when she rejects you because of your approach. On a final note, don’t be fucking creepy. If you’re ten plus years older than the girl, don’t invite her to your beach house the next time she’s “passing through your town.” Gross. Maybe just start with a compliment and a “howdy!” Maybe let’s do some polite getting to know each other before you assume I’m down with GILF’s. (Grandpa’s I’d Like to Fuck, ICYMI)
4) Shock Topics
Dude, stop talking philosophically defending pedophilia, bestiality, or selling children on the black market and wondering why the ladies aren’t flocking to the cause. This is asinine. These topics are so deplorable and are not only sending ladies running for the hills, but men who have morals and standards as well. These topics do NOT help spread the message of freedom and liberty, these are the topics that make freedom loving folks wanna justify actions of the state. It’s not being “edgy” or “philosophically sound”- it’s enforcing the stereotype that we’re a bunch of people who just wanna watch the world burn and hope the free market saves the folks who can “accept the ugly side of freedom.”
5) You Don’t Listen
Yup. I said it. Age old source of arguments between men and women since the dawn of humanity. When you ask a question that should be answered by women, it indicates that you’re going to listen to women’s opinions and digest that information, hopefully, putting it to good use later. Usually, these discussions online are categorized by the same tired responses, including, “I’ve never seen anyone do that to women in this group,” or “I disagree with your actual life experience and I’m about to tell how why I know more about women than you do,” and “oh yeah, well let me tell you about all the reasons it sucks to be a man.” If you want to pretend that you’re superior to every woman involved in that particular discussion, that’s your prerogative, but again, for the love of God, stop cock-blocking the good dudes! Be a flipping wingman; tell the ladies how amazing it is that they love liberty, even if you don’t believe it. Do it for your bros. Do it for the kids. Stop being that guy at the end of the bar nobody wants to talk to.
Let’s make Libertarian groups and gatherings places women WANT to be – places they brag about to their friends. How about creating an atmosphere that encourages women to share their opinions and ask questions? Let’s help those ladies out there learn about freedom and how amazing it is, even when they may have an opinion or belief that leans toward government intervention. We can share our ideas with care and tact and let women learn and change their minds. For cripes sake, we LOVE to change our minds- give us a flipping reason to change it to loving freedom and abolishing government overreach. Stop being your own worst enemy.
For Some Examples of what NOT to do….
*Screenshots shared with permission from Kristin Hawthorne